So, it finally happened.  It’s not like I didn’t have plenty of notice, but it’s still kinda hard to believe that today’s my 40th Birthday.

Just before I put on my slippers and start researching hip replacement procedures, I’ve decided to bring together some of the biggest things I’ve learned in the last 40 years.  There’s been a few of these “x things I’ve learned” posts around recently (I’m just waiting for the first “5 things I’ve learned now that I’m 5” post), but it seems fitting somehow that I give some good thought to the last 40 years to see just what the heck happened and what I can learn from it all.

While a lot of it’s a blur (anyone seen my 20′s?), here’s the first 20 things I’ve learned (the second 20 will be along soon).

1. There really is nothing more valuable than your health.
2. It’s natural for friends to come and go, but my family is both persistent and wonderful.
3. Whenever I resist something, the more of a struggle it becomes.  As Picard used to say, “Engage”.
4. Laugh with life.  Always. Frankly, I don’t like the alternative.
5. Even if I want to punch someone, curl up into a ball in pain or run away as fast as I can, always have a smile ready to go.
6. Some solitude is required, too much is dangerous.
7. Singing to yourself in the car always feels good.
8. When I’m faced with something insurmountable, I make a choice as to whether it’s something I want to start or not, and then I trust myself to begin. Whatever happens after that is for later.
9. I can’t be all things to all people.  The best I’ve got is all I’ve got.
10. Intimacy is probably the scariest and most wonderful thing I can think of.  The trick then, is to not let the scary bit overwhelm the wonderful bit.
11. Some of life’s very best moments are spent with good people over a good meal.
12. Life is too short to spend it working with assholes.
13. My expectations of myself are almost impossibly high, because I know just how big a dent I could make in this little universe of ours.  I know that those expectations can sometimes hurt me, so I’ve learned to reset them when they’re harmful.
14. I waste too much time watching TV and playing PlayStation, but that time soothes me.  So perhaps it’s not wasted after all.
15. I’ll always find it hard to ask for help, but that doesn’t change the fact that I sometimes need it.
16. I could never date a smoker or a vegetarian.
17. I have the ability to engender trust from just about anyone in no time at all, which is all the more reason not to abuse that trust.
18. The most precious thing to me is seeing a moment of undeniable truth.  I call it magic.
19. Don’t cling tightly to a belief or a way of thinking if I know deep down that I can’t defend it or honour it.
20. My heart leaps every time I see an underdog trying hard, and it breaks every time I see someone who thinks they “can’t”.  As much as I might want to help or jump to the rescue it’s not always my job to.