I was a little abrupt with a client the other day.

Every question I asked, and every point I made was met with an elaborate exposition that eventually made me interrupt in no uncertain fashion with “Stop talking. Stop. Talking.” Shocked, my client stopped talking.

It was our 3rd session, and what was abundantly clear to me was that she was determined to keep talking and talking and talking, but with absolutely no intention of doing anything. I explained this to her, and then cut the session 30 minutes short, “I’m going to stop the session here for today. You know exactly what you need to do, so get to it and let me know what happens.”

Maybe a little blunt, but I had a serious point to make to her.

Talking about something is a brilliant way to not get around to doing it. It’s actually really nice thinking - the more you talk about something the more it sounds like you’re getting ready to do it, and the more you convince yourself that you’re getting ready for it.

It’s a great stalling tactic. For as long as you’re thinking about it and talking about it, you’re not actually doing it. You’re buying yourself time, and when you give yourself extra time it increases the time you have available to second guess yourself.

The more time you spend talking about doing something the more room you give for your doubts and fears to grow. The more time you spend talking about doing something the more time you have to come up with reasons to let yourself off the hook and not do it.

It’s one of many delaying tactics that your Gremlin uses to avoid doing things that might be risky. Keep doing that and your confidence will be in tatters.

If, like my client, you find yourself doing the same thing, you need to stop talking and just go and do something.